David starts dancing naked in front of the ark, but it's his woman who gets put down? Apparently it's better to dance around naked then it is to talk back to a man. But just seeing his dad (drunk and passed out) naked, caused Ham to get a generational curse on his whole family line! I've heard that Ham's real sin was that seeing his dad naked aroused him, the biggie sins of homosexuality and incest. But it didn't seem to bug you much, Alpha, when Jonathan loved David. And when Lot drunkenly impregnated both of his daughters, you had nary a word to say to him, but his daughters were written as the wicked ones.
Lot's wife gets turned into a pillar of freaking kosher salt for just looking back at the fireworks as her city burned to the ground, yet David kills a man just because he covets that man's wife (Commandment #10, at least in the Deuteronomy list.) and you call him "a man after God"?
And then there's that whole "sin blind" thing, where all sins are considered equal in your eyes. Did your followers make that one up out of whole cloth, because in the Bible it pretty much seems to me like you punish women for being women, and like you're highly inconsistent. You have favorite children and the rules don't apply to them. Solomon and David raped and pillaged and killed and conquered and supposedly you endorsed this. Yet Lot's wife, who doesn't even get the respect of her name appearing in the Bible, is killed by extreme sodium chloride overdose? It makes no sense.
I'll let the well-spoken and unreasonably good-looking Theoretical Bullshit close this out.